NST,Wednesday 16 March 2010
While everyone agrees that children should not be spoiled, only a few among us are truly capable of disciplining our children well.
Parents who are indisciplined are unlikely to be effective in disciplining their children, as children naturally learn more through example.
It is a mistaken belief that children would not be spoiled if their guardians are strict. Scolding or punishing may produce good behavior but only temporarily.
The most noticeable result in such endless exercise is anger. The vicious cycle from angry children to angry adults has not been broken from the dawn of civilization and is certain to continue into the future.
However, some children become submissive when issued with such threats and stop their antics and tantrums.
Some may grow up well through forced discipline but a few would become monsters once they reach adolescence, or when away from the clutches of the dominant parent. Therefore, suppression will fail in the long term.
Parents must realise that discipline is just the means and to an end. The end is also not merely to excel in studies and extracurricular activities. The main responsibility of parents is to guide their children to become fine human beings.
A strong foundation cannot be built with just toys, money, lessons and a regimented life. It can only be cemented by genuine love and care which is beyond ordinary parental love and affection.
However, if they are raised with only the parents’ agenda in mind, they may never discover who they really are.
Those with a lost childhood may well continue to be lost souls in adult life. They join the rat race in the pursuit of wealth, fame or power. Those who succeed would try hard to hold on as losing what they have gained is not an option. It would be too devastating.
It is of utmost importance that children have a happy childhood to pave the way for them to become happy adults.
Anyone who is happy and makes others happy is a truly successful person.
The world salutes parents who raise such fine human beings.
YS Chan
Kuala Lumpur
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